Retirement is often seen as a time of relaxation and new beginnings, but for many couples, it can also be a period of significant upheaval. While it can be a time of exciting opportunities, it can also force couples to question what they want from their relationship in their later years.
Many marriages hit the rocks when couples retire. The Office for National Statistics has revealed a recent surge in divorce for people aged 65 and over. Social trend forecasters predict that almost one in every 10 people experiencing divorce by 2037 will be “silver splitters.” People are living longer, and there is less stigma around separation than there was in the past.
The switch to retirement can put a significant strain on a marriage that might have been stable when both partners were working and not “forced” together all day. Problems can also arise if one party has retired while the other still works, especially if this results in a role reversal or different expectations of what everyday life will be like. The retired person might struggle with loss of status and identity and potentially be bored, while the other person is still working and extremely busy.
If one party worked away during the marriage, giving both parties space, that suddenly ends on retirement and can be a huge strain. Small irritations can quickly mount up. Additionally, parties might have different ideas of what their retirement will look like. For example, one might want to travel the world while the other is happier being at home pottering about in the garden. Inevitably, this will cause problems if there are different expectations.
On average, we spend around one-third of our life working, which amounts to approximately 90,000 hours over a lifetime. Giving up work is a massive change for any couple, and it is one of many reasons behind divorce. Given we are all living longer, there could be many years in retirement. More women than men instigate divorce in their later years. However, it is important to note that both parties will end up suffering a reduced retirement lifestyle in the vast majority of cases, as the assets built up during the marriage have to be shared between them. Pensions are a huge consideration at this stage in life and something parties need to consider carefully with their solicitor if the marriage breaks down.
On the positive side, people are also remarrying in later life more than ever. However, we would always advise considering a pre-nuptial agreement to protect not only themselves but also their children from any previous relationships. An up-to-date will is also vital!
Hopefully retirement is a time of pleasure and enjoyment, but if it is not and you are looking ahead with a sense of dread do, please get in touch with our family law Newcastle Upon Tyne team for pragmatic advice before making a final, life changing decision.
Here at Hay & Kilner we understand that deciding to separate from your partner is one of the hardest decisions you can make. Our dedicated team of legal experts are here to make the process of separating from your partner or divorcing your spouse as stress and pain free as possible with personalised support and guidance.
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‘Hay & Kilner’ and ‘Hay & Kilner Law Firm’ are both trading names of Hay & Kilner LLP, a limited liability partnership registered in England & Wales with registered number OC418767. Our registered office is at The Lumen, St James' Boulevard, Newcastle Helix, Newcastle upon Tyne NE4 5BZ and we are authorised and regulated by the Solicitors Regulation Authority (Authorisation number 643191). We use the word ‘partner’ to refer to a member of Hay & Kilner LLP. A list of the members is available at our registered office.